Cold, cold night

An unexplainable plethora of emotions consumed me as I leisurely browsed through the aisles, looking for something nice to munch on during my self-planned BauerFest* later that evening. It was exactly as how it would be for some sappy movie where love's lost and the apt soundtrack carries the mood throughout that scene. Well, this is no drama but as I walked down that biscuit section, and without anyone in my vision, I heard these words played through the speakers:

Sadness In my eyes
No one guessed
Or no one tried
You smiled at me
Like Jesus to a child
- George Michael

I stood there, stunned, and I felt my heart sink. I wanted to cry.

I was incredibly overwhelmed by my emotions and all I could think of for a good 2 minutes was how depressed I felt, but I didn't know why this was happening to me. I don't recall having anything to be sad about. So I slowly picked myself up and moved towards the chips.

The chips did not help with the temporary disorientation. My emotions were racing so I found difficulty digesting all that variety in front of me. I wandered aimlessly between the two aisles for awhile and just when I thought I was okay again, I caught my hand reaching for the Prawn Crackers when both my mind and tastebuds had agreed on Apple Chips. What was I doing? Was I so affected that my mind and body became independent of each other?

So I did what I deemed best. I wallowed in self-pity and I felt sorry for myself all the way back home. But not without telling myself to abandon all these emotions on the bus when I got off. There was no way I was going to carry this baggage into my house, my domain.

I didn't quite succeed because I seemed to have left a trail but I'm sure I'll be fine in the morning. I usually manage to sleep it off, especially if it's something I have absolutely no clue about. Perhaps I really am afflicted but I just don't know it yet. Perhaps the song managed to reach deep within me and brought forth something that I've not realised. Whatever it is, I know that I need to submit this to God or I am never gonna be able to get out of it.

*BauerFest = To indulge in a few episodes of 24 back-to-back and celebrate the fact that Jack Bauer is THE man.

I'm feeling: Spiritless
I'm listening to: Boston - Augustana